each and every person has a story to tell...and most of the times, it is about the difficult or hard times in that particular person's life...to us who is listening to it, yes, those stories are very interesting but to me, i always realised something, the person who tells the story always emphasizes on the outcome of the story or the things that person had learnt from it because to them, at that point when they share their story, the thing that they truly wanna highlight is who they were today after all those hard times they have been through...
life is constantly changing with or without us realising it...it has been almost 20 yrs i exist in this world...i never dreamt that i will come to this day with all those things following behind me...i just couldnt believe what had happened to me...
after entering college, i changed alot...i hardly have friends around me...and from young, i always wanted to have a bunch of friends who cared for me and be there for me whenever i needed someone...my biggest fear is darkness and loneliness...but today, after what happened, i actually had so many people around me...trying their very best to bring me up to my feet again...i sometimes hates myself so much, questioning myself, why am i not helping myself whereby people around me are doing their best to help me...maybe i was always protected, that is why, today, im not strong enough to stand by my own to get through this...i always had something to fall back and i always wanted to win...but this time, no matter how i wanted to win, theres nothing i can do to change the fact that i had lost the care, the trust, the love i had given to someone whom i truly wanna have...
this process of recovery is extremely painful and tiring...i do not know when i will fall to my knees once again and cry for help...but i will always remember words that everyone is telling me, I CAN DO THIS...i really wanna thank each and everyone of you guys who helped me soo much....way more than a normal friend would do...the care you guys gave me, is what i wished to have always...and now i have it...i have no reason to stop there and not moving forward because i know theres alot of people ahead of me, calling for my name....i will walk through this with a great story to tell and a great lesson to share...i love you guys...thank u so much...^^
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