unexpected gains

today, the sky is really so clear, and the night does not seem to be as dark as it supposed to be...i wonder why...but i aint searching for an answer scientifically, but an answer which only has its truth for me...to me, tonight, something is telling me that, even as dark as the night can be, there are days where it is much darker and days which are much clearer, just, like today...everything and every cycle in life has its ups and downs...

feeling such pain within, i taught it was going to be such a bad and long night with works to be done...well, something unexpected happened...i watched a clip, a 3 minutes clip...it was a clip where such a sweet song were playing and pictures of a couple were playing...that song and the pictures were sweet, but to me, so painful, each tune of the music, each word heard, each scene of the clip just slices through my heart...all i wanted to do is just go home, get back to my room...

i sat there, wondering, 10 years down my journey of life, where would i be, who would i be and how things are going to be like for me at that time...then i realised, love, is really just a chapter of life, yes!, it is essential, it is a must have it in our lives, to fill in the gaps in our lives...although it might take a large portion to certain people,even to me...but tonight, for that moment, i am able to gain an insight of understanding and seeing that other things in life might not mean so much but that is when i looked at 1 thing, but when various essential parts in our lives are put together, it actually takes a much larger portion than love and family itself....without them, there is no place for the existance of love and family...somehow, a way or another, tonight's gain from the insight i had had put me slightly back to the track, and i know what i should do for right now at least....

to get to wherever i would be in the future, it all depends on my doings now...we really do not know what will come next but i can be quite sure, i can be as happy as the couple in the clip if not happier...and the couple, which happens to be someone close...someone whom i really wanted to be all these while...